We have lived here for almost two weeks now–it will be two weeks on Saturday! Hurray!–and we are getting settled. For those of you who don’t know, I hate unfinished products; which explains why I stayed up until 2am and made six trips from our old house, just so we could have all of our stuff here in the same day, and unpacked. This has been a lesson in letting projects be undone. I have a picture in my mind of what this home should look like, be like, how it’s space must be occupied; and most of it is not done yet–although, from the outside, it may look like we are near finished. Oh no, my friend, the fun has just begun. But my controlled spirit aches for it to be done today. For it to be done now. I can’t rest until it is done.
But, as I am building this home of ours, I am beginning to see that it may never be done. There will always be more to do, more that I can add, more naked spots on the wall to be occupied with pictures and Scriptures, more things to spray paint, more colors to add to our scheme, more messes to clean up, more trains to trip over, and more dishes to do. The product will never be fully finished.
Much like me. I see the dreams I have for this home; God sees the dreams he has for this heart, which he has made his home. There is delight and excitement of how far it’s come, and anticipation for what is to come.
But unlike me, the Lord, the perfect homemaker, does not need to sleep or rest [I like to pretend I don’t need sleep…let’s see how far that will get me with decorating…].
…He who keeps you will not slumber. psalm 121:3
He continues his work on me, even as I rest. He never stops dreaming for me; he never stops planning. He doesn’t procrastinate, he doesn’t give up, he just keeps going. He keeps conjuring, he keeps beautifying, he keeps remodeling. He splashes more color with each day; sometimes, the paint is dark–but where is the beauty in all brights? We would all be looking like Easter eggs if we splashed ourselves in all neons [although, American Apparel may disagree on that being a fashion faux pas]. No, it is the grey’s contrast to the orange that brings out the tones that makes a house a home. It is the charcoal with the yellow that pours out comforting hues. The brightest of colors are made soft with the dark splashes. Pinks, greens, yellows, and blues would do nothing for a home without their dear accented friends of grey, black, taupe, and purple.
It is the dark nights of our soul that brings out the beauty of our joys. It is the painful splashes, and deep hues, that make our heart [Christ’s home] full of comfort and gentleness.
In the shadow of his wings, will find refuge. [psalm 91:4].