Oh Girl, [you can say no]

Oh Girl…

I was a lot like you once, desperate for attention and affection and all that’s natural and good-but not knowing how or where or when to get it. So I made my own path to receive-Oh Girl, our own path can be full of mud and muck and left over slops. 

You can still say no. 

Whether your standing, sitting, or lying on that bed. Whether your dressed in Sunday’s best or that night-time too-short skirt…Oh Girl, you can still say no. 

And if he says “yes, yes, c'mon yes, this is how I’ll know you love me; don’t you love me?”

Run for the hills. Because true love is so much more than secrets and shame that follows the next morning…True Love is a man that says, “I’ll wait for you in every way." 

We’ve heard the metaphors–tape doesn’t stick after it goes around the circle, a flower crumbled can never be the same…we’ve heard what sex (outside of commitment, marriage, true love) does to us as girls…too many purity talks for my taste…but have you heard that there’s One who requires nothing of you yet offers you all the love you’ve been searching for? No Sunday in bed can quench that thirst, Girl. No touch of a smelly, protein filled jock can solve distance with your dad or heal hurt from your mom.

Oh Girl, you’ve heard it, you know it: you need Him. The One who formed your heart and holds it in its delicate place. 

He knows you. He knows your story. He sees you in the quiet places. 

And, although the Giver is worthy of our adoration, more than the gift…Oh Girl, He’s got good things coming for you-trust me, I’ve seen it first hand.

Trust me: true love is the one who spends Wednesday morning with you paying bills, laughing about life and future and failed dreams, after six months of marriage. 

true love is the man that holds your hand after 35, 45, 55 years of sleeping next to you [and only you]

true love is the man who runs to Yogurtland at midnight because your pregnant body demands it…fiercely. 

and true love is the young guy standing across from you on a Saturday night, promising his life for you, promising to take all the bullets and arrows you throw or that come towards you, for you. 

And, Oh Girl, none of this starts with a text of "show me more,” or “our secret." 

That True Love Guy is out there, but you gotta wait wait wait Girl, and it. is. hard. But when he appears…Oh there are no secrets to be kept because he will be proud of you, and proud to share you with his world. 

You can still. say. no. No matter how close you are to giving in, no matter how many times you’ve said yes. No matter what’s been taken from you ages or days ago [without your permission]. Today: You can still say no.